affiliate marketing Hindi Urdu Sher O Shayari And SMS: Punjabi Jokes

Punjabi Jokes

Son : Papa 10+10 Kine Hunde Ae?
Papa : Ghade, Kanjra , Ullu De Pathe, Nalayak, Haramkhor,
Tenu Kuch Nhi Aunda Ja Andron Calculator Le Ke Aa.

1 Aalu Ne Bhindi K Number Pe I Love U Ka Msg Beja,
Bhindi Ne Use Phone Kar K Bura Bhala Kaha Aur Boli,
Shut Up, Tum Itne Mote Aur Main Slim And Smart,
Aalu Ko Bahut Dukh Hua Aur Us Ne Phir Itni Sabziyan Fasaayi Ki Aaj Aap
Dekh Skte Ho,
Aalu-Ghobi,
Aalu- Bengan,
Aalu-Shimla Mirch,
Aalu-Palak,
Aalu-Matar,
Aalu-Gajar
Aur Bindhi Us Din Se Aaj Tak Akeli H,
Moral: Mat Kar Itna Gurur Surat Par Ae Haseena.

Ik Tiwi Apne 6 Baccheya De Naal Rail Vich Sawar Hoyi,
Sammne Ik Budda Bidi Pee Reha Si,
Bidi Naal Tiwi Disturb Ho Ke Boli, Please Cigrate Peena Band Kar Do,
Apne Samne Nahi Padh Sakde, Bidi-Cigrate Peena Mana Hai!
Budha: Madam, Main Tan Padh Lawanga, Pehlan Tu Taan Padh Lai Apne Saamne,
Board Te Likhya Hai, Bacche Do Hi Acche!

Ikk Bohta Kale Rang Da Master Ik Jattan De Jawak Nu Bolya, Main Kal Eh Padhaya Si Ke,
Sadda Shareer Kis-Kis Cheez Naal Banya Hunda Hai?
Chal Hun Tu Dass?
Jawak: Ik Pani Ton, Ik Hawa Ton, Te Ik….
Jawak Master Nu Ik Maar Dekhan Lag Gya,
Master: Te Hor Kis Cheez Naal???
Jawak: Ik Tarkol Naal…

Ek Amli Te Ek Janani Bus Ch Chadh De Han
Bus Puri Tra Full Hundi A Amli Aapne Nal Bhang Le Ke Aaya C Te Janani Ik Bag.
Bus Full Hon Karke Oh Bhang Te Bag Taki Kol Rakh Dende Han.
Conductor Aanda Hai, Te Amli Nu Kehenda Hai, “Oye Eh Bhang-Phosdha Keehda Aa”.
Amli Jabab Denda Hai, Jee Bhang Ta Meri A Phosdha Eh Bibi Da Wa.

Rabb ne tiwi nu sunder banaya
Khoobsurat dimaag vi diya
Hirni jehi aakhan deyi
Gulab jehe honth
Pyar bharya dil ditta
Te fer Jubaan deke sab te pani fer ditta…

E Zindagi di chahat da silsila hai koi mil gaya te koi Vichhar gaya,
Jinna nu Mangaya si Duwawaan che O Kisi hor nu Bina mange mil gaya.

Kinni Jaldi E Mulakaat Gujar Jandi ae,
Pyaas bujhdi nahi ke Barsaat gujar jaandi ae,
Rajni Apniyaan yaadaan nu keh de ki na aoun,
Kyonki Hun Neend aundi nahi ke raat gujar jandi ae

Luddi atte Dhamaal Inna di Jaggo Nyari aa...
Hakki, Balibaal, Kabaddi Khed Nyari aa..
Ral Mil Ke Mele te Tyohaar Manaunde Ne...
Sara Jag Gawah PUNJABI Sher Kahaunde Ne.....

Dastak Dil te Tere Yaar kabul Hove,
Khushiya nal Paroya Har kabul Hove,
Saddi nahi Aaukat Tohfa Dain Di,
De Sakda ha Ik Bas PYAAR Kabul Hove,......!

LIKHAN WALEYA TU HO KE DYAL LIKH DE
MERE KARMAAN CHE YAAR DA PYAR LIKH DE
IK NA LIKHIN TE MERE YAAR DA VICHHODA
BHAVEN DUKHRRE HOR HAZAAR LIKH DE

Shayad yaadan da dard Tu vi te Hadondi hovain gi,
Jada nahi do pal he sahi.........

Na Mathey Di Lakir Dekhi,Na Hattan te Likhi Taqdeer Dekhi,
Hanjuan De Wich Dub Gaya Yaar Tera,Jad Teri Tasveer Dekhi,
Pher So Na Sakya, Jad Sutta ta Supne Ch Bani Tu Heer Vekhi,
Rajni Tu Haar ban K Sanu Chhad Challi,Hun Bikram Nu Bande fakeer Dekhi...! .......

Avein gairaan naal mitha saatho bol ho gaya,
Saadi zindagi ch zehar avein ghol ho gaa,
Rahe unglaan de poteyaan chon lahu simda,
Saatho hireyaan bhulekhe kach fol ho gaya....

Ranjhe ton jayada kise Majnu ton ghatt na,
keeti honi kise ne vi Eho jihi hadd na,
Chann tare Tethon Asin var diyan ge,
Ehna sohniye Asin Tainu pyar diyan ge.

Aaj dil di kehen nu jee karda hai
Tere dil vich rehen nu jee karda hai
Khushiyaan deke tere gham sehen nu jee karda hai
Rabb jaane saada ki rishta
Tainu bas apna kehen nu jee karda hai............

ANNA HAZZARE

Santa: oye tenu pta hai sarkaar ne chaar aane band kar dite hai?
Banta: o kyun santa oye sarkaar kolo ek anna (hazzare) nhi sambhalya jaa
rhea te o chaar aane kivein sambhalegi…

NAIN-MATAKKA

Custmer: teri majh di 1 akh ta khrab hai, fer v tu isde 25 hzar rupye mang
reha hai.
Santa: tenu majh dudh peen layi chahidi hai ya nain-matakka karn

KASH MAIN MOBILE HUNDA

Kudi Bust Stop Te Khadi, Mobile Te Gallan Kar Rahi Si,
Boy ohnu Comment karda hai: Haye! Kash main mobile hunda,
Teriyan Gaallan (chicks) naal lagya hunda…
Kudi: Haan, fer main ghar jaa ke charger teri *$%*& ch laundi…

Dirty Jokes

Sir: Which is the most dangerous alphabet?
Sharma: Ji, ‘W’.
Becouse all “Worries” start from W.
Top Examples:
Who.
What.
Why.
When
Whom.
Where.
War.
Wine.
Whisky.
Woman.
And finally…
Wife (Worries Invited For Ever.)

INTERNET SE DOWNLOAD

Wife to Husband: Tumhe Pyar Karna Nahi Aata.
Husband: To Kya Ye Bachhe Internet Se Download Kiye Hain???
Wife: Nahi Eh Tan Singh Sahab De Pen Drive To Litte Ne.

Teri yad rudh jandi akhan cho pani banke,
Ki khatya es rooh ne diwani ban ke,
Bhaven ho gaya hun sadi akhan toh dur,
Par dil vich wasya hai pyar di nishani ban ke

Mitha intzaar te intzaar nalon yaar mitha,
Mitha yaar te yaar nalon pyar mitha,
Mitha pyar te pyar nalon mithi saadi yaari,
Ehsaas ton mitha kuch nahin milna lab ke duniya saari.....

Aag baal ke tandur garam kita,
Kach bhan ke chakna chur kita,
Aag lag jave unhan majburiyan nu,
Jinhe sanu tere toh dur kita.

Kyon rakhaan hun main apni kalam vich syaahi
Jad koi armaan dil vich machalda hi nahi
Pata nahi kyon saare shak karde ne mere te
Jad koi sukya phul meri kitaab vich milda hi nahi
Pyaar te bahut kardi si us nu
Par ki karaan o pathar-dil pighalda hi nahi
Je rab mile te us kol apna pyaar mangangi
Par sunya hai oh kise naal milda hi nahi
 
Kali-kali nu jod ke phul banda,
Fulan-fulan de milan nu bahaar kehnde ne.
Dil-dil nu jod ke rooh bandi,
Roohan-roohan de milan nu pyaar kehnde ne!

Je gal usde pyar di hove,
koi ik aakhe main 5 dassan...
Je gal mere intzar di hove,
koi din aakhe main saal dassan...
Je gal usde wishwas di hove,koi dil
aakhe main rabb dassan...
Je gal mere dard di hove,koi
rovve te main jor jor hassan..
 
Koi Kar Ke Shararat Tainu Daran Nu Ji Karda,
Bhul Ke Dhuk Dard Mera Tainu Hasan Nu Ji Karda,
Us Rab Naal Nahi Vasta Koi,
Mera Ta Tainu Rab Banaun Nu Ji Karda

Koi kehnda RABB garibaan da
Koi kehnda RABB badnasibaan da
par tainu paa ke Bikram, main kehndi
RABB mere varge khushnasibaan da

Khushboo teri yaari di saanu mehka jaandi hai,
Teri har ik kitti hoyi gal saanu behka jaandi hai,
Saah taan bahut der lagaande ne aun -jaan vich,
Har saah ton pehle teri yaad aa jaandi hai.
 
Teri doori ch, Ik majboori ch,
Ik zindagi adhoori ch, Roshni di Ik kiran jhalki disdi hai,
O YAARA tu jithon lang jaave, Uthon di ta mithi v vikdi hai.

Too Nae aayya tere yad aaye,,
tera vada yar wafaa kar gae,
Taino milan di tangh pal pal maino
Mera aman sakon tabah kar gae,
Booha nenan dar kharkeya kaae
Varii main samghya asar dua kar gae,
Jad kholya dar tay kugh v nahii,
Saday nal mazak hawa kar gae.

Deedar tere nu asin tarasde haan
Tainu ki pata kinna tere layi tadapde haan
Tere dil di gal tere hothaan rahi padhde haan
Tu haje vi puchhda hain,ki tainu kinna pyaar karde haan?

Iven rus ke na sathon mukh mod soneya
Sadda tere ton bagair keda hor soneya
Uthe hundi hai umeed jithe zor soneya
Tainu meri nai par mainu teri lod soneya

Saada chan jeha yaar apni chamak gawave na
Phullan jeha chehra ohda kadi murjhave na
Ohdi akh vichhon hanju kadi dulle na
Manga Rabb ton dua oh sannu kadi bhulle na!

Tu lakh bhula ke vekh lai
Asin yaari fer v nibhavange
Tu paani pee-pee vekh lai
Asin hirchki ban-ban awange!

Asi ishq de vairi aap hoye
Asi khud nu zeher khawa baithe
Jehri maut ton loki darde ne
Us maut nu meet bana baithe
Is ishq che inne phat khade
Asi apna aap gawa baithe
O vehla hun nahi bhul sakde
Jis vehle usnu asi chah baithe.

Hasda vasda si dil mera,enu ishq da rog lava baithi
Ik bholi jehi surat naal main bin samjhyaan yaari la baithi
Phul samajh apnaaya si,kandeyaan ton hath chilva baithi
Kuch mitheyaan bolaan khatir,gamaan de rog lava baithi
Is ishq de chakraan vich Rabba, main apna aap gawa baithi.........

Nakhra tuhada tauba-tauba
Ajeeb tuhada style hai
Msg kadi karna nahi
Rolla paya sadde kol Mobile hai

Je rusya yaar hi mann jaave, Phir Rabb nu manna ke ki laina?
Je yaar ne saanu takna ni, Roop sheeshe nu vikha ke ki laina?
Je hosh bhulayaan yaar mile, Taan hosh che aake ki laina?
Je yaar ne saanu nakaar ditta, Phir asin vi jee ke ki laina?
Je yaar ne hi dil tod ditta, Dukh horaan nu suna ke ki laina?
Lok Rabb de aasrey jeonde ne, Asin yaar aasrey jee laina
Ik hanju vi je gir jaave,Asin amrit samajh ke pee laina
Je yaar hi hove Rabb varga, Phir hor kise ton ki laina?
 
Lok puchhde saddi mohabbat baare,
Asin aapni kahani kyon dassiye?
Kahaniyaan taan banangiyaan saddi mout pichhon,
Asin aapni jubani kyon dassiye?